The Spring 2012 Pop Trifecta

It is said that things come in threes. Meals, bad luck, Charlie’s Angels. Often, this theory holds up for music the media force-feeds the masses. Whether it be three artists or three songs, these mediums resemble an Alzheimer’s patient.

1. fun. We Are Young. [TV Commercials]

Yes, you know the song. First used to make the Chevy Sonic seem like the hippest, coolest vehicle for hip, cool people to own, this song quickly morphed into an instant anthem of youth and adventure. Infectious enough to reach farther than the band’s usual indie-kid following, this song had everyone meowmeowmeowmeowing.

2. Gotye. Somebody That I Used To Know. [Saturday Night Live]

This is an unlikely hit by an even unlikelier source. This not only sounds like the soundtrack to the ’90s Aussie Cartoon Bananas in Pajamas but the chord progressions are so simple it seems Gotye wrote the song while taking a bath. Gotye impersonates Sting while Kimbra impersonates Katy Perry and don’t bother to remember either of their names as we can feel the next hit pointedly not coming on.

3. Grouplove. Tongue tied. [Gossip Girl]

A simple rave song about sex at the best friend’s house, appropriately featured on Gossip Girl at a time when Nate finds out he’s been banging his best friend’s mom. Grouplove are the first to think they’re golden but honestly, being featured on this show guarantees a band’s success at this point.

Mimi

And I’ll Miss You Most Of All, Brooke Davis

The final season of One Tree Hill has brought us a variety of series-spanning, long-time-coming, end-tying moments. Brooke’s absent father returning to seize his thousandth chance from his daughter, Brooke being a mother at long last, and, of course, the redemption of Dan Scott. It was the only way Dan Scott, in all his darkness and all his wrongdoing could actually die: a hero.

This show delivered an entire other level to the commercial teen drama playing field. OTH always played decent, mature, often indie music. Making a nod at both Stephen Kellogg and the Sixers and Augustana, our favorite show proved to have more of a voice than Gavin De Graw. With possibly the biggest character, Tric, they directly spotlighted the music of Kate Voegele, Bethany Joy Galeotti and Tyler Hilton. OTH knew they had gained some influence and were ready to use it. The last night was no exception, featuring The Horrible Crowes, a band who sported one of the most quality debuts of 2011.

Some of the snappiest lines from this season were exchanged between Brooke and her Karen’s cafe competitor, but none trumped Julian’s explosive last words to Brooke’s father: “It rhymes with thick….Dick, Ted. You’re a dick.” And yet this line of Julian’s paled next to when he told Brooke, “A character who doesn’t love Brooke Davis…I wouldn’t even begin to know how to write that.”

There was a hostage situation, a fire, a feud, a proposal, an adoption, a stalker, multiple arrests, shootouts, and a monumental death. But these final moments will never amount to all that this show has done and the ways it has helped its viewers, its friends, for nearly a decade.

Mimi

Another Blog Milestone

Well, here we are readers. 20,000 views! I’m so impressed by your interest in my interests and I’m thrilled to be a go-to media generator. I promise to keep things cutting-edge as ever and here’s to another day. Another post about another band or another pilot, whether it be written for 5 readers or 1,000, here’s to the future. Honestly, it may not be a big deal but I don’t know what standards are for blogs these days. Moreover, I just wouldn’t know the first thing about being jaded.

Mimi

Hell is Empty and All the Devils Are Here

On the return of One Tree Hill, some sort of havoc was occurring and, as we traced it back, gentler outcomes were given. Everyone spent the day in bed and the short time in-between was only as long as, say, a crappy country song. Nice one, Chris Keller. Yes, Chris Keller is back for the final season. And Nathan thought Dan Scott was the worst of his problems.

 Nevertheless, we only had a brief moment to relish in the insult aimed at Alex Dupree before we were back in bed. Then she brought us the staple sexting fail, by really wearing the hell out of a piece of paper.

The writers are clearly trying to fight Brooke and Julian just being another set of boring parents, but c’mon. Jamie wasn’t an end to the fun; except that Peyton and Lucas left soon after he arrived…Also, does anyone else think it’s a bit odd that Brulian’s twin boys look nothing alike?

And that other mind-numbingly dull couple is still on the show. There’s nothing to say about the them. 

The real question is, will Dan Scott have mellowed and will Nathan become comfortable with him living with them, or will he be overwhelmed by the intense voice in his head shouting, “Kill, kill, kill!” ?

Mimi 

The Road To Success Is Paved With Candy

To recap 2011, pop music shamelessly dominated the music scene.  Between the sudden dance party of Foster The People, the omnipresent Bruno Mars, and the ear-rape return of Maroon 5, it was inescapable. Let’s cut to the chase. There is one goddess of power pop, bringing us another round of the Teenage Dream and single-handedly boosting sales of cupcakes worldwide.

Tying Michael Jackson’s long-standing record, with five #1 singles off one album, is it any surprise that Katy Perry would win MTV Artist of the Year? She took us on a tour through the seven levels of the candy cane forest, so I don’t think so.

Likewise, it would take the one and only She-Wolf, Latina Columbian Goddess Shakira to bring us a song as infectious as Rabiosa. Whether in her gumball-filled bathtub or somewhere south of the North Pole, this mocha song made many a fan want to bite her en la boca. Also not surprisingly, this became an internet sensation with more than one hundred million views.

This year, Nicki Minaj made sure that absolutely everyone got that Supa Bass. Aspiring bubblegum pop stars should take a pointer from the diva - get a British child to sing your obscenity-laced ghetto princess code and you’ll move to the candy-striped HOV lane. And let’s up the video views to 200,000,000+.

Finally, thanks in part to the recent Jersey Shore culture, LMFAO dominated the clubs this year with jams like Party Rock Anthem. With a title like that the fro’d duo were already golden. Throw in their outfits and once again, golden. Then, a skewed sense of confidence; well, everyone has that these days! With 300,000,000+ online views, these two goons held the keys to the Gingerbread Haus, a place for garish metallics and hipsters alike. The doors are open. Embrace the pop. Every day I’m shufflin’.

Mimi

On Tina, On Amy, On Horatio, On Tracy!

Saturday Night Live‘s most cheerful success story, Jimmy Fallon, was back to host the Christmas episode this week and it was, “so good to be home.” Musical numbers a’plenty, old characters, and fellow esteemed SNL vets including Rachel Dratch, Tracy Morgan, Horatio Sanz, Chris Kattan and special guest Jude Law might have had something to do with the night’s success.

One highlight was the Weekend Update Joke-Off: deskmates Tina Fey & Jimmy vs. Amy Poehler & Seth Meyers, reminding us of all the chemistry and splendor this segment used to possess. Too bad all we have now is Vanessa Bayer’s shark teeth. Another highlight was a mirror, mirror scene fabulously mimicking the classic with Mick Jagger. And lastly was a parody of the broadway production War Horse, where Jimmy played the role of the horse. With great hosts one right after another, as with Katy Perry’s dedication last week, we appreciate our gift, Lorne. Merry Christmas indeed.

Mimi

Holidays & Hospitals – CW Style

This week on the CW, it was the mid-season wrap-ups for everyone’s favorite shows and the dramatic cliffhangers were surprisingly similar.

 On GOSSIP GIRL, Charlie Rhodes/Ivy Dickens is supposed to fear her less-than-intimidating ex Max, as he teams up with Nate’s scorned cousin/public figure, Tripp. For the time being Serena is pining after Dan Humphrey yet again; a character pairing you know as well as I that we’ve thoroughly exhausted. 

The episode came to a close when Blair chose Chuck over Louis and the two escaped together, but were chased by vicious paparazzi who ran them off the road - in laughable scooters, no less. Reminiscent of the time Serena was in a car accident, hmm? If GG is determined to hire new writers, they should at least be given a run-down of previous episodes.

In conclusion, we’re supposed to believe that Chuck Bass dies.

Over on 90210, the girl from the sorority who hated Naomi hates her again and no one can really blame her, Dixon and Adrianna have a simple little relationship and all their worries were quickly sung away, and Navid choked up around the wrong thugs. Then Annie and Liam “kinda hooked up”, Navid was in the hospital next to B. Waldorf’s room and Silver jumped to her own conclusions, therefore taking on her lover’s child.

Meanwhile, Naomi’s boyfriend cheated with her nemesis and Liam was madly searching for Annie, hoping she wasn’t selling her body to her old man friend, when he got hit on his motorcycle by a girl with a striking resemblence to Arielle Kebbel. 

So watch out for frequent hit-and-runs this holiday season, kids. I’m sure there’s a PSA in this somewhere. 

Mimi

Reasons We Love Paul Brittain

Paul Brittain is a new, often overlooked cast member on Saturday Night Live who shines in his own special way and here are just a few concise reasons why we love him.

1. He’s modest. With few recurring characters and even fewers lines, Paul Brittain is overjoyed to be included and stacks every building block he’s given into a castle of comedic genius. For quite a while, Paul also had a modest following on Twitter of only a few hundred; proving how underground the comic really is. I always thought a successful SNL retiree like Jimmy Fallon (with 4.5 million followers) should have started a campaign for the guy but now Paul has moved up in the world – 2,000 followers! [https://twitter.com/#!/paulbrittain3]

2. He’s small. It’s true that good things come in small packages, that baby animals are much cuter than full-grown, and who doesn’t like a quick-witted child? Paul brought us all of this! He’s small, great, and definitely manages to hold his own next to the rest of the average-sized adults!

3.  This. Lord Wyndemere. At the first “I want sweets!” we were sold.

saturday-night-live-wyndemere

Mimi

Sex In The Air, I Don’t Care

I have one question for you: when watching the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show and complete outfits are manifestations of an uncreative fashion director’s mind, what are they selling? High fashion runway shows have the models stripped down and androgynous to highlight the clothes. Once again Victoria’s Secret reminds us that they are not selling lingerie. They are selling an image; the words LOVE PINK plastered across every Freshman rear in college, and they are technically selling the models whom they feature like rare goddesses. Say, if I can’t buy the elaborate super-chick costume that Doutzen Kroes is wearing, what exactly can I buy? Doutzen? No, wait, that covered-up bra…under the costume. And yet present-day society’s views are so warped that worshipping underwear models while blaring Rihanna‘s S&M is already quite the norm.

Mimi

Hoping That You Won’t Find A New Rhodes

Gossip Girl opened this week with old Fitz and the Tantrums‘ Breakin’ The Chains Of Love which didn’t quite fit the scene, season, or mood.

And it would have been so easy to make a smart move and feature The Black Keys‘ first single off their forthcoming album El Camino. Lonely Boy offers all the female vocals and soul you ask for from Fitz. But no, let’s spotlight stale R&B as opposed to time-sensitive current music your viewers actually crave.

Follow that up with Gossip Girl narrating the scenes with sad, out-of-date music references and, well, now you’re just flaunting your flaws.

Serena was overly-bronzed and too blown out and, once again, they dressed the blondes in layers of gold and sequins.

Meanwhile, Chuck showed up at Blair’s house after she fled his therapy session on which she had, of course, been sitting in. This necessitated following Ms. Waldorf’s theatrical show from room to room, grilling her for sweet truths. Oh, what a touching reunion.

On the lowlight of the show, Dan and his agent fooled around in the wonders of Twitter, reminding you of every news anchor as of late and your grandma. Keeping up with the holidays, I see.

And how will we bid adieu to our Gossip Girl viewers until next week? Let’s tie it up with a red-and-white striped bow! They’ll love some juicy, predictable line about being a Rhodes. There ya go.

Wake up, writers! This is not a drama you can just phone in from last season’s wardrobe, the first season’s theme episodes and weak, mainstream, been-there-done-that music.

Mimi